Do you remember a while ago, we picked up on the F1.com Secret Life interview with Michael Schumacher, in which the seven times champion gave what may be the dullest answers ever? He certainly didn't enter into the spirit of the questions, and he picked up minus points on Christine's Rankings thanks to that.

Here's an example:

Q: Do you have any tattoos or piercings?

MS: Only temporary ones.

Q: What did teachers say about you in your school report?

MS: Not nice things.

Q: Who were your childhood heroes?

MS: Hard to tell. I did not really have any.

Not one to waste words, that Schumacher chap. So, with the return of the off-season and a Friday to be filled with Fun, Mr C came up with this idea - let's answer the questions for him! You can see the full list of questions (and abrupt answers) here, and let us know what you think the great man was really wanting to say if he wasn't so shy and/or grumpy.